Monday, March 05, 2007

conceptual becomes norm

Who has blue and purple flowers anyway?

Me. This flower arrangement was carefully created by my mother some twenty years ago, and costing roughly $75 in silk flowers alone at the time. I thought it was lovely, but I thought she was nuts.

Really. Blue magnolias and dark purple roses? What is this, some weird conceptual or abstract flower arrangement?

And maybe it was, back then. Edgy. Creative. Not the normal red or pink roses most people went for. I even remember the cashier looking as her a bit funny when the odd assortment was rung up. Then my mother turned it into magic. For twenty years ago, that's what I thought it surely must be, to be able to take purple and blue flowers and make them a centerpiece or a conversation piece.

Now my arrangement attracts hardly a second glance, let alone a compliment. Now, purple roses and blue magnolias are so everyday that it's not a striking arrangement as it once was. Now it's normal as at best and out-dated at worst.

I think the envelope pushed back.

Remembering back to when I was a child, pushing my own envelope, I found out that I had pretty ordinary limitations that were my comfort zone. I also said growing up that one day my dad would die and I'd do everything I was too afraid to try when he was around to chastise me for it.

And one day he did die. Everything changed.

I woke up without the restraints of convention tying me to a code I'm not sure I even believed in. Oddly, only my thinking changed. But that thinking spread to my desires, which is spreading to my actions.

I bought a Sony Minolta A100 camera today, and some great accessories (filters, etc) to go with it. Sure, Dad would've said put the money in savings instead, and that's what I had earmarked it for, but this was an investment in me. I've always wanted to take myself seriously as a photographer, and this is my first step towards it.

Wish me luck.

1 comment:

Jon said...

God luck! ;)