So I've fielded phone calls from friends whom I care about describing the evils of the actions of the men they've married. Dammit, women!! Why commit yourselves to people who cage you, suppress you, deny you your own dreams, and want you as their mommies and not their wives??
1. "You're so much better [in bed] than all those other women...." This was said to a friend of mine deep in the night after conjugal relations with her husband. He then denied cheating on her.
2. "Yes, honey, you can go work on your master's degree for the next eighteen months... but I'm never gonna see you (in a whiny voice) and I'm gonna miss spending time with you...." Pouting, moping, and melancholy ensued.
3. "I don't want you to go get a job. I want to take care of you." Followed a few days later by "All you do is cook and clean while I go work all day. What do you contribute to the marriage?" Don't get me started on this one.
The women that are married to these neanderthals will call them "nice guys", to which I say "puh." They may be nice, but they are severely lacking in some common sense and some respect and admiration for the women they married. Oh, and they are acting like jerks.
Women, please realize that "nice guys" do not guilt you into giving up your dreams, do not belittle your efforts in a marriage whether you are the rocket scientist or the housewife, do not make comments about how great you are in bed when compared to the other women that they are [not] sleeping with. I cannot even begin to describe how ridiculous it is to justify and excuse actions such as these with "but he's a nice guy" or better yet, "but I love him." Sometimes love isn't enough.
And sometimes love is warped and twisted and sees various evils as lesser than others, therefore excusing them. Please take an honest look at yourselves and do not settle for less than the best from your man -- any man. And men, do the same with regards to your women.
Relationships -- healthy relationships -- are supposed to be the very best of both people involved. One should not be carrying the other all the time. One should not be raising an adult child (or trying to), it should be an equal partnership between two equals. If it's not, there's a good chance it's not a healthy relationship. And if you won't suffer with the flu, pneumonia, or even allergies because of how they make you feel... why would you suffer in a relationship that's making you sick?